Mr. Too Good to be True

Let’s face it, these online dating services are loaded with frogs. I’m talking the round, bumpy, icky kind. Every day I get email, “winks,” and “likes” from scores of them. Most apparently are quite unaware that they are frogs.

 

Occasionally, a picture pops up that makes you go, “wow!” His profile seems perfect. He’s in the right age range, has all his hair, beautiful physique and loves puppies and rainbows after long walks on the beach. He wants to buy lots of presents for some special lady, but just hasn’t found his one true love.

 

If it sounds too good to be true, there’s a good chance something isn’t so true about that profile. Here’s some things to look for after you get done drooling over the lovely black & white photo he posted with his shirt blowing open revealing his perfect abs as he strolls along a gorgeous water front.

1. His photos all look like they’ve been shot by a professional photographer. They probably were. And aren’t of him. They are, however, some Abercrombie & Fitch model (or wannabe) and he found those pics unprotected on that guy’s portfolio site.
2. His profile details are incredibly vague but read like a romance novel. Most of today’s online dating services offer professional profile writing assistance. If his written “voice” isn’t unique and a little too perfect, it’s probably a paid advertisement created just to get your attention.
3. His details don’t match his photos or the pics seem oddly familiar. For example, I received a wink from Jason Momoa. (If you don’t know who that is, think the hot modern Conan or Khal from Game of Thrones.) Now, I’m assuming Jason does not live in Texas. Nor is he over 40 seeking women 25-35 in Texas, and his build is far from “about average.” (The photo faker did try to say he worked in entertainment/the arts/modeling, just to give it a little edge of realism.) Luckily, the service offers a “Report a concern” link that allows you to report the fraudulent use of photos and faked profiles, and you should.
4. Other details don’t add up. For example, he may be a student but lists his income over $150,000. This is not likely. He claims to be a model but has no photos. He’s a lawyer but education doesn’t list a degree. He has an advanced degree but couldn’t spell his way out of a paper bag. Don’t get too nit-picky because we’re all human and make mistakes once in a while, but when too many things don’t add up, take note and move on.
5. There are no photos. This is generally a red flag. I’ll go into detail on that in a later post.

The best test is to just message the guy and ask him about something in his profile. If his photos look more like selfies or are a compilation of those kinds of pictures we all gather over time, there’s a possibility you’ve actually stumbled upon a frog prince. Keep in mind, though, that it is likely 2000 other women are messaging your prince, too, so he may not get back to you. Ever. And that’s okay.

 

(Originally posted on my old blog.)