Avoiding Photo Crimes

Ladies, studies have shown that you need to have at least three good, flattering pictures to get attention via an online dating service. And, if you’re in decent shape, at least one full body shot will get much better response than headshots only.  Given it seems most men treat an online dating service like a catalog, having quality pictures is critical to getting your money's worth from whatever service you join.
     However, if you're serious about finding a quality date, you REALLY need to avoid posting pictures of yourself that fall into any of these common no-no categories:

• The duck-faced, cleavage-baring selfie (men get sick of these fast)
• The too much makeup/sleazy clothes photo (unless you want them to think you’re a hooker)
• The bathroom mirror selfie (including phone)
• The driving my car selfie (unsafe and unoriginal)
• The yoga pose (unoriginal)
• The bad hair day photo (it might seem funny, but is a guaranteed date repellent unless you’re a Victoria’s Secret model)
• The food-in-mouth photo (another guaranteed date repellent)
• The look-at-me-drinking-alcohol/partying photo (especially bad in bulk)
• The lying-in-bed “sexy” shot (unless you’re only seeking one-night stands or looking for creeps and predators)
• The bikini shot (see above)
• The kissing-another-girl photo (again, will only draw creeps)
• Pictures of you with other men, unless they are relatives and your captions say so
• Pictures of you with other women who are in better shape or cuter than you
• Pictures of you acting sexy with other women (unless you’re actually looking for a ménage a trois)
• Cheesy glamour shots with big hair and loud make-up
• Pictures of you doing anything rude, crude or stupid
• More than one picture of your pet(s)
• Pictures of your kid(s) – avoid this for safety reasons, too
• Pictures of you in a wedding dress, unless it’s from Halloween and you have a cleaver sticking out of your head. No, just skip the wedding dress.
• The I-just-gave-birth photo (man repellent for sure)
• Pictures with bad coloring or lighting issues (Try changing it to black and white if it’s otherwise a good picture.)
• Pictures that are more than a year old
• Pictures of random landscapes or objects that have no captions to explain their presence
• Scores of the dorky, posed “Look at me, I’m in a foreign country” shot (you’ll scare off any men that haven’t travelled as much)
• Grainy or pictures that require a microscope
• Anything a potential date has to squint at to figure out what you look like
• For safety – avoid photos that show information that makes you easy to find/stalk: last name, workplace, home address, license plate, school name (if you or your kids are still in school)

     Some of you will argue that the “sexy” or “party” photos get you more attention. While this may be true, it’s probably not going to be healthy attention that you get. There are plenty of creeps and future stalkers/sex offenders online, and those types of pictures will inevitably attract them and not so much the guys who are worth your time. So, even though those pictures of you with your boobs hanging out all over the place while you down the contents of a giant beer bong will get you plenty of dates, before you post those kinds of photos, consider whether you are seriously looking to meet a prince, or just hoping to kiss as many frogs as possible, charmed or not. Oh, and if a guy asks you for a photo like that, decline and move on. More than likely, he’s just looking to collect bed post notches and might leave you with a sweet little STD in the process.
       Do include pictures that reflect your personality and give viewers a good idea of what you look like. Here are some ideas:

• At least one nice headshot that isn’t overly posed
• Candid photos that depict you happy or having fun (without alcohol)
• Photos of you doing something you love to do
• Photos of something you actually enjoy that the guys all love, too, like attending a professional sport event, fishing, hunting (Just remember, he’ll expect you to do the same with him, so don’t fake it.)
• Photos should be at least 600×400 in size
• Keep the number of photos between 3 and 10 – any less gets limited response and any more makes you seem narcissistic
• At least one flattering full body shot, even if you’re a little overweight. Sure, you’ll be less likely to get responses from those shallow men who look like movie stars than if you don’t, but you’ll be more likely to get a call back if your date isn’t surprised by your body type when he finally meets you.

     All in all, if you’re truly looking to meet someone special and not just become another flavor of the week, your photos should be honest, clear visualizations of who you are, not how you want to be seen. You might end up with fewer responses, but do you really want to hear from tons of men who aren’t likely to turn out to be your Prince Charming? (Trust me, it’s just a waste of time.)  There is someone out there for you, and he’ll appreciate you for who you are and how you really look.